


A reply to Vriska's invitation to talk after all of this is over

by gamblignant8



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, chatfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-31 04:44:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17842703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gamblignant8/pseuds/gamblignant8
Summary: tEREZI SENT ME YOUR NOTE, aBOUT WANTING TO TALK NOW THAT YOU'RE BACK,aND I SPENT UH, a LOT OF TIME THINKING ABOUT IT,





	A reply to Vriska's invitation to talk after all of this is over

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CommanderEivlys](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommanderEivlys/gifts).



AT: tEREZI SENT ME YOUR NOTE, aBOUT WANTING TO TALK NOW THAT YOU'RE BACK,  
AT: aND I SPENT UH, a LOT OF TIME THINKING ABOUT IT,  
AT: aBOUT HOW IT WOULD GO, aND WHAT YOU WOULD SAY,  
AT: aND I KNOW IT'S BEEN A REALLY LONG TIME,  
AT: aND YOU AND I HAVE BOTH CHANGED A LOT, i MEAN, pROBABLY,  
AT: wELL I MEAN,  
AT: i DON'T KNOW THAT YOU HAVE BUT, tEREZI IS, i THINK PROBABLY A PRETTY GOOD JUDGE OF THIS STUFF,  
AT: aND I GUESS I DON'T KNOW, tHAT I HAVE EITHER,  
AT: bUT I DO HAVE SOME VERY COOL NEW FRIENDS, tHAT THINK SO, aND THAT IS GOOD ENOUGH, aCTUALLY,  
AT: aND I GET WHY, yOU WANT TO,  
AT: oR WHY YOU THINK I'D WANT TO,  
AT: tALK, i MEAN,  
AT: i GET A LOT OF THINGS ABOUT YOU NOW, bECAUSE I'D NEVER REALLY, kNOWN WHAT YOUR PROBLEMS WERE,  
AT: bUT NOW I REALIZE THAT YOU, aND I, hAD VERY DIFFERENT PROBLEMS,  
AT: aND WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO DO TO ME WAS, wHAT YOU THOUGHT YOU NEEDED FOR YOURSELF,  
AT: aND NOBODY DID FOR YOU, wHICH IS PROBABLY VERY SAD,  
AT: bUT DOESN'T MEAN IT WASN'T WRONG,  
AT: bUT ALSO, hAVING A BIG TALK WHERE WE, cLEAR THE AIR,  
AT: iS SOMETHING, pROBABLY, tHAT YOU WOULD WANT FOR YOURSELF IN MY PLACE,  
AT: lIKE, yOU LIKE WHEN STORIES HAVE A BIG, sATISFYING CONCLUSION,  
AT: aND WE, hAVE HAD A LOT OF THOSE,  
AT: aND NO MATTER WHAT THEY ALWAYS END WITH,  
AT: hURT FEELINGS, oR WORSE, hURT, uH, eVERYTHING  
AT: aND YOU MAYBE FEEL LIKE YOU DESERVE TO HURT,  
AT: bE HURT, i MEAN, bECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID,  
AT: i DON'T THINK YOU EVER REALLY FIGURED OUT HOW TO APOLOGIZE, iN A WAY THAT WASN'T JUST PUNISHING YOURSELF,  
AT: wHICH, i GUESS, fITS, wITH THE STORIES YOU TELL, aND THE STORIES I WAS A, cHARACTER IN,  
AT: aND SOMETIMES, iT WAS FUN, tO BE THAT CHARACTER,  
AT: bUT,  
AT: i'M A DIFFERENT KIND OF, tHING THAN YOU,  
AT: aT SORT OF, a BASIC LEVEL,  
AT: aND I THINK MAYBE WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW, iF I COULD,  
AT: i MEAN,  
AT: i GUESS TEACH YOU ONE THING, nOT THAT YOU'VE EVER WANTED MY HELP REALLY,  
AT: iT WOULD BE THAT,  
AT: hURT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE REPAID,  
AT: aND I DON'T WANT TO HURT YOU BACK FOR HURTING ME,  
AT: i DID ONCE, aND THEN I DIED, bECAUSE OF IT,  
AT: aND BEING DEAD SUCKS, aCTUALLY, wHICH, i GUESS YOU ALSO KNOW,  
AT: sO MAYBE YOU'LL UNDERSTAND,  
AT: bUT I'M GETTING OFF THE POINT,  
AT: i DON'T WANT TO YELL AT YOU,  
AT: oR MAKE YOU LIST OFF A BUNCH, oF APOLOGIES, fOR EVERYTHING YOU DID,  
AT: aND HOW WHAT YOU DID MADE ME FEEL ABOUT MYSELF,  
AT: aND SO WE COULD TALK AND YOU'D, pROBABLY, bE, kIND OF DRAMATIC,  
AT: bECAUSE THAT IS HOW YOU ARE, bASICALLY, wHICH,  
AT: tHERE ISN'T ANYTHING WRONG WITH,  
AT: sOMEONE HAD TO BE PROBABLY,  
AT: wE WERE ALL, sTUCK IN A VERY DRAMATIC, cIRCUMSTANCE,  
AT: iN A WAY YOU ALWAYS, gOT BETTER THAN ME,  
AT: aND FIT IN WITH BETTER THAN ME,  
AT: bUT IT TOOK A WHILE TO REALIZE THAT THAT'S NOT,  
AT: yOU BEING EVIL, oR ME BEING WEAK, oR WRONG,  
AT: iT'S JUST US BEING DIFFERENT,  
AT: iN A WAY THAT,  
AT: i DON'T THINK EITHER OF US, aCTUALLY, nEED TO,  
AT: dECIDE IS WRONG ABOUT US,  
AT: bECAUSE, aCTUALLY, wE,  
AT: hAVE DIFFERENT STORIES,  
AT: eVEN THOUGH IT SEEMED FOR A WHILE LIKE IT WAS, tHE SAME ONE, aND WE KEPT, fINDING EACH OTHER AGAIN,  
AT: aND, mAYBE, iT ALMOST WORKED,  
AT: aND, mAYBE, iT HURTS TO GIVE UP,  
AT: i THINK, i MEAN,  
AT: i PROBABLY, dEFINITELY, lOVED YOU, eVEN THOUGH I DIDN'T REALLY, kNOW WHAT THAT MEANT,  
AT: aND IT'S, kIND OF FUCKED UP, tO HAVE DONE SO,  
AT: bUT, aLSO, i THINK, yOU PROBABLY, dEFINITELY, lOVED ME, iN A, wAY THAT WAS, fUCKED UP, iN SORT OF THE SAME KINDA WAY,  
AT: aND SO, yOU CAN THINK, lIKE, bECAUSE OF THAT WE HAVE TO WORK IT OUT,  
AT: oR FIGURE IT OUT,  
AT: bECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THE HEROES, dO, wHEN THEY'RE DONE BEING HEROES,  
AT: bUT YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO BE DONE BEING A HERO, aCTUALLY,  
AT: oR, aT LEAST TRYING,  
AT: aND EVERY TIME WE CRASH, iNTO EACH OTHER AGAIN, iT ALWAYS FEELS LIKE, wE'RE SIX SWEEPS AGAIN,  
AT: aND THAT'S BAD FOR ME, bUT ALSO IT'S BAD FOR YOU,  
AT: aND, iT SUCKS,  
AT: bECAUSE A LOT OF THE WORST KIND OF HURT, tHAT I'VE HAD, wAS BECAUSE I WAS TRYING TO BE WHAT YOU WANTED, oR NEEDED, oR THOUGHT YOU DID,  
AT: bUT, aCTUALLY, wE JUST,  
AT: aRE WORSE AROUND EACH OTHER,  
AT: iN A WAY THAT NO APOLOGIES CAN FIX,  
AT: aND IN A WAY I CAN'T EVER REALLY FORGIVE,  
AT: sO YOU'D APOLOGIZE, aND THEN I'D NOT BE ABLE TO FORGIVE YOU, aND, i'D, uH, fEEL BAD ABOUT THAT,  
AT: aND YOU WOULD FEEL BAD, tOO, bECAUSE YOU, wOULD THINK YOU DIDN'T APOLOGIZE RIGHT,  
AT: sO YOU'D WANT ANOTHER TRY,  
AT: aND WE'D KEEP DOING THAT, uH, uNTIL SOMETHING REALLY BAD HAPPENED, pROBABLY,  
AT: sO, lET'S NOT TALK, aCTUALLY,  
AT: oR SEE EACH OTHER, aGAIN,  
AT: aND NOT LEAVE, sOME KIND OF OPEN, iDEA THAT MAYBE WE WILL, iN THE FUTURE,  
AT: bECAUSE THEN IT WILL, bE HANGING OVER ME, aND HANGING OVER YOU, aND WE'LL NEVER GET AWAY, fROM WHAT HAPPENED,  
AT: aND THAT WON'T, lET US EVER BE HAPPY,  
AT: aND I DO WANT YOU TO, bE HAPPY,  
AT: i ALWAYS DID, yOU KNEW THAT,  
AT: aND YOU,  
AT: wELL,  
AT: i DON'T THINK YOU'RE EVIL,  
AT: i'M GLAD YOU MADE IT BACK, aND I'M GLAD YOU HAVE HER,  
AT: aND I HAVE STUFF, tOO, tHAT, i DON'T REALLY WANT OR NEED YOU TO KNOW ABOUT, bECAUSE I STOPPED,  
AT: lISTENING TO THE VOICE OF YOU, iN MY HEAD, tELLING ME IF I WAS DOING THE RIGHT THING, oR NOT, aT BEING, "FULFILLED"  
AT: aND I THINK, i'LL KNOW, tHAT THINGS ARE OKAY,  
AT: iF YOU RESPECT THIS,  
AT: aND DON'T, tRY TO, sNOOP, i GUESS,  
AT: dON'T GET UPSET AT THE ACCUSATION,  
AT: nOT THE HUMAN KINETIC FORCE POETRY MAN,  
AT: i MEAN PRYING,  
AT: aND I,  
AT: wILL MISS YOU, uNFORTUNATELY,  
AT: bUT THAT IS, tHE REAL WAY THAT WE GET BETTER,  
AT: bY BECOMING THE SORT OF PEOPLE, wHO DON'T THINK OF EACH OTHER, aND LIVE OUR OWN LIVES,  
AT: aND, wE HAVE THE FREEDOM TO DO THAT, iN PART BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID,  
AT: sO, tHANK YOU,  
AT: aND GOODBYE.  
adiosToreador [AT] blocked arachnidsGrip [AG]  



End file.
